Archive for December 2nd, 2009

Self-audit (finally starting it up again) and Advice: FROM me ABOUT Zooey Deschanel, totally SFW!

December 2, 2009

Grand news. The parent-teacher conference went wonderfully!, beyond my wildest dreams!, and I think I may even have snowed kidlet’s teacher in to buying that I am an adult, an elaborate new con on which I’ve been working, whose growing success at the grocery, church, and among new acquaintances is beginning to perturb me and make me check for crow’s feet.


via zooeydeschanel.us

On the way back from picking up the kidlet and Special K from the park where they played while I was at the conference because I was busy conferencing on top secret conferencey shit, Katohs and I were discussing all things fantastic, adorable, unique, and vintage-ish, as we are wont to do, and she said, “I came to a point in my life where I realized I was never going to get to be Zooey Deschanel, and I was like, ‘What’s the point in going on?'”


via zooeydeschanel.us (again)

I replied, “But that’s okay. All we can do is try to inject a little Zooey into each day, like be inspired by her energy!” advancing one of my typical over-optimistic, all-god’s-chillun-got-hands, hippie-crazy-go-nuts solutions that often barely even mean anything in the final analysis. When I am up against a tough point in conversation with a friendoh who is downohs, I sometimes morph into Dharma from Dharma and Greg — cryptic comments about the universe and energy and destiny just fall out of my mouth. But I think, actually, this time I managed to string together some pretty good advice!


via zooeydeschanel.us (again)

I think we women often admire a quality in another woman and somehow, whether it is something ugly and atavistic, or something society has trained us to do that we can more easily shake off, we want that quality for ourselves instead of simply accepting with grace and admiration what a lucky thing it is that that other woman has the quality we like and how fortunate we have been to experience it. We are a covetous bunch, we ladies. “If I could sing like her; if I had hair like hers; if only I had her body; her style; her car or career or cake serving set…”


via zooeydeschanel.us (again)

“…then?” What? Your life would be perfect? Never! There has never been a perfect, easy, or charmed life in the history of EVER! We are wasting such chances with our jealousy and poisonous reaction to a standout quality in another gal, blinded by our instant avarice: when something sticks out in your mind about another woman, ignore the negative instinct and instead seize a vital opportunity to connect with a woman, as two people. We need all to work on this.


Lost credit, one of my zillion pics back before I was wise enough to source

We have to love each other first, because then loving ourselves will come next, and then when you have so much going on already, it’s only natural that the love of whatever man or woman strikes your fancy will follow! (See, if the whole admire-other-women-and-love-them-for-the-reflection-of-the-creator-in-them-that-is-also-in-you bit didn’t work, then hopefully the it-will-make-your-crush-crush-back bit will. I’m new-agey but also very sneaky!)


Lost credit, one of my zillion pics back before I was wise enough to source (again)

None of this is to say Katohs was jealous. She was expressing admiration for Zooey Deschanel. But I think it’s interesting that our culture has conditioned a young woman, especially even one as bright and categorically outstanding as Special K, to, when she sees a woman she admires and idolizes, even joke about wanting to be her, rather than just be able to be like her. Weird people we all are or have been made to be. I’m trying to change, personally. I’m hoping it’s something that can be a choice.


Lost credit, one of my zillion pics back before I was wise enough to source (again)

Other highlights: over lunch at Thai House, I introduced Katohs to the concept and history of “spoonerisms;” kidlet told me flatly that she was going to marry Jude Law, and, when she did, I would need to build her a house for them to live in (knowing Jude Law and the rumors I have heard of his skeeviness this is entirely possible and I guess I had better start saving); and Special K and I determined that it is mainly okay to slap a baby if the baby is really, really annoying.


via zooeydeschanel.net

No babies were slapped in the writing of this self-audit.

Music Moment: Snake River Conspiracy, “You and Your Friend”

December 2, 2009

Snake River Conspiracy – You and Your Friend

From the LP Sonic Jihad, treat yourself to Snake River Conspiracy’s track celebrating the joys of polyamory, “You and Your Friend.”

“Threesome” by wondermaker on deviantart

In my dreams, I can see us in a tight embrace,
doing all the things
that we never really did:
I think I’m in love with you.
Must we go run through our lives with our eyes closed
to the loving happiness that we can share?
I think I’m in love with
You and your friend,


Tobey “the Tornado” Torres, original lead vocalist for Snake River Conspiracy, and pal Theresa Beth “Tairrie B” Murphy of Tura Satan, My Ruin, and LVRS.

Honest, I do,
I can’t see you and me and her without each other
And I hope you feel the same way too
(you and me and her)

I spend all my time on the telephone line,
Trying to say it just right this time,
Something that could change your mind

I know this is love and I feel it there,
I’ll whisper something so sincere
Exactly what you want to hear

l to r: Scarlett Johanssen, Penelope Cruz, Javier Bardem. Still from Vicky Cristina Barcelona (2008).

Now you know the things that I say when I’m swimming
Through the flood of all my
desire (can be so unclear)
But I know I’m in love with you.

In my dreams I still see us in a tight embrace
In spite of all the things that
the people say when they stare
that’s how I know I’m in love with
you and your friend,


“Comfort” by drakablue on deviantart.

Honest I do, I can’t see you and me and her without each other,
And I hope you feel the same way too
I think i’m in love with you

(bridge)


Just Tobey

I spend all my time on the telephone line,
Trying to say it just right this time,
Something that could change your mind.

I know this is love and I feel it there,
I whisper something so sincere,
Exactly what you want to hear


“Three Way Kiss” by Terry Richardson

Honest I do, I can’t see you and me and her
without each other
And I hope you feel the same way too

I think I’m in love with you (you and me and her)
I hope you feel the same way too


“Know This” by rantl on devianart

I think I’m in love with you (you and me and her)
I hope you feel the same way too
(you and me and her)
(you and me and her)

I hope you feel the same way too
(you and me and her)
(you and me and her)
(you and me and you and me and you and me and her)

Ellen Von Unwerth — Please Do Not Feed the Talent edition

December 2, 2009

Ellen Von Unwerth, “Boardwalk Girls,” Art+Commerce portfolio, 1997.

“Achtung! Bitte ziehen Sie nicht die Modelle.”

(“Attention! Please do not feed the models.”)

“Attention ! Veuillez ne pas alimenter les modèles.”

You must not feed the talent.

Then they will just clamber all over the pier scrabbling for dropped popcorn and never go back to their natural environment to hunt in the wild, as God intended when he created models.

Tru’s corner: Truman Capote regularly featured, inaugural edition

December 2, 2009

This is a ghost post. I imagine right now I’m setting off some soosh bombasticos with Special K and the kidlet. It’s renumeration for babysitting services about to be rendered: Katohs is taking kidlet to the park while I get the earful from the teacher about what’s been what with anarchy in the 5K so far. Garr, so nervous… anyway here is some great advice from my b’loved little Tru.

It is nothing less than scandalous that I have not yet put up some of my Truman Capote pics and quotes, because I think so much of him, and more than just of the image of him as aging raconteur with which he is associated. Hopefully I can share some pics and quotes to show you my perspective. Can’t believe I haven’t started that yet. Totally meant to. So sorry.


I’m about as tall as a shotgun, and just as noisy.


Gossiping poolside with the girls: one of them is Gloria Vanderbilt, Anderson Cooper’s mommy

Friendship is a pretty full-time occupation if you really are friendly with somebody. You can’t have too many friends because then you’re just not really friends.


Lost the credit: help if you can

“I don’t care what anybody says about me as long as it isn’t true. “

That’s all I have time for, will return!

“L’eccentrica, il giullare che strappa un sorriso”/The eccentric, the jester who snags a smile: Sadly brief introduction to smashing Lou Doillon (NSFW)

December 2, 2009


Lou Doillon by Max Vadukul for Vogue Italia, August 2009

“Crescendo ho ocupato l’unico spazio rimasto libero in famiglia; quello dell’eccentrica, del giullare che strappa un sorriso. c’era talmente tanta perfezione che solo comportandomi in modo diverso sono ruiscita a trovare me stessa.”


Photograph via The Following Aesthetic Reasons

If you are not lucky enough to speak Italian (I am mainly not, either, no worries!), then here is a very rough translation pieced together via babelfish (don’t you love that it’s named for a Douglas Adams invention), Conversational Italian in college — which I spent most of my time ditching to fuma (smoke) and hang out with various uomi (men!), in my defense, I was being hella Italian — and a couple online dictionaries:


Image via thebeautymanifesto

“Growing up, I occupied the only space which remained free in my family: that of the eccentric, that of the jester who snags a smile. There was so much perfection that being involved in various ways has helped me to find the same [in life].”


“Lou Doillon Intime,” Playboy France, March 2008

A bit of background. Her father is director Jacques Doillon, and her mother is international superstar, ye-ye idol, and reknowned vintage beauty (a personal patron saint) Jane Birkin. Oh, and Jane’s previous husband was probably the most famous and successful male French musician of all time, (a personal devil) Serge Gainsbourg.


Beautiful, marvelous, multi-talented Jane Birkin during her marriage to That Creepy Soul-Reaper (Gainsbourg).

Birkin’s relationship with Lou’s father, film director Jacques Doillon, ended her marriage to Gainsbourg, and because of that the French press have a love-hate relationship with Lou: on the one hand, she is a daughter of cultural aristocracy; on the other, her very existence symbolises the end of one of France’s great love affairs.

Lou’s various step and half-sisters are famously beautiful models, actresses, and musicians such as Charlotte Gainsbourg, Kate Barry, and Lily Doillon.


“Destiny’s Daughter: Lou Doillon et Jane Birkin,” Getty Images

After a deliberately outre ugly duckling phase and some raw turns in cool indie flicks, Lou has been slowly transitioning in to a model citizen herself. So … yes, I can see where she is coming from with that quote. She’s a really cool chick, and as you can see from this small smattering from my collection of pics, she has taken it off, so she gets to be billed as lovely and talented, to boot!


Lou Doillon by Max Vadukul for Vogue Italia, August 2009

I’ll get to more about her another day, I guarantee, because I think she is a smashing girl! but right now I need to go put on my Square Face (read: look freshly-made-up, decently-dressed, and reliable and maternal) for my kidlet’s first parent-teacher conference. I don’t want my appearance or attitude or nuttiness or any grain of reality about myself to seep through to her teacher and influence said teacher’s attitude toward her. I know that’s crazy, but it’s a fear. Wish me luck!


Photographed by Takis Bibelas

Movie Moment: Kentucky Fried Movie, “United Appeal for the Dead”

December 2, 2009


“Although so far, there is no known treatment for death’s crippling effects, still, everyone can acquaint himself with the three early warning signs of death.
  • 1. Rigor Motis.
  • 2. A Rotting Smell.
  • 3. Ocassional drowsiness.”
  • (The Kentucky Fried Movie (1977).

    Watch the full clip below if your interest is piqued by the screencap and quote. If you’re not a fan of the Zucker-Abrams-Landis collaborations (Airplane, the Naked Gun flicks), maybe you should give it a skip because it might offend you. It’s tasteless and deadpan. I think it’s hilarious, but I’m a horrible person!

    Star Wars shenanigans

    December 2, 2009

    Last night was supposed to be Star Wars and Indiana Jones trivia night at the pub, but there was a snafu with the printer and we did regular trivia instead. Total folklore!

    It’s been rescheduled for next week. So, if you are in the area, come down to P. Wexford’s in Modesto next Tuesday starting at 7pm for cheap Irish pints and a no-holds-barred*, bloody-knuckles-trivia-showdown. Prize is a free round of beer for the winners! And the knowledge that you are the geekiest person in the pub. Which is saying something, believe me!

    *okay. Some holds barred. Boob honks and throwin’ elbows are just plain not allowed.

    Liberated Negative Space o’ the Day: Il tempo non esiste edition

    December 2, 2009


    Genoa, Italy

    “Time does not exist. Watches exist.”

    Happy Wednesday!

    December 2, 2009

    I know I have used this picture before …


    Wednesday and her dolly, Marie Antoinette.

    … but I still think it is just about the most adorable thing ever. Lisa Loring as Wednesday on the 1960’s television series The Addams Family.

    Got my kidlet’s first parent-teacher conference in a bit, here. Incredibly nervous!

    Milo Kustoms — Art, Photography, Gear, and More! with bonus musings on significance of the resurgence of a rat rod and rockabilly culture

    December 2, 2009

    I am lucky enough to have a rad bro and his equally rad ladyfriend as two of my great special friendohs, Milo Weasel and Cinder.


    Left: Milo with their rad car; Right: Cinder and Milo at the Tattoo Expo at the Cow Palace a few years back.

    Besides forays into painting, pin-up photography, and kickass custom-made merchandise through their amazing creative work on their official site, http://milokustoms.com, they also attend car shows with their superfly ride.


    Brain asplodin-adorableness: Cinder is married to the sea! Photographed by Mike Wedel/Milo Weasel.

    I was incredibly excited to get an email from Milo a few days back, sharing that his picture and car were featured in the magazine Amusin Krusin.


    Milo is in the upper left. The caption reads, “It ain’t gonna fix itself, Skippy, no matter how much you stare at it.”

    You can visit their site to view their gallery of work, contact them for custom work, or sound off on the site’s message board, which has lots of great pics of other cool cars.

    The rockabilly and car cultures keep alive some of the pulpiest and most interesting facets of the initial pop countercultural movements of the ’50’s and ’60’s while thankfully thumbing their nose at some of the lamer (sublimation of femininity, racism, etc). As a cultural phenomenon, the resurgence of interest by this generation in the styles, music, and cultural symbols of that era I think represent an intersection between an acknowledgment of how the optimism and booming capitalism of that time failed our country, but also how it had grains of greatness in it. So chew on that, tease your hair, roll your cigarettes up in your shirtsleeve, and rock them billies, hepcats and kittens!


    Baby, you can drive my car — Cinder-cat at the wheel!

    Daily Batman: Batman’s heart is not in this gay thing

    December 2, 2009

    You are not selling him on the gay thing, Batman. Give it some jazz hands!

    When art influences life: Sam Haskins Month, Day 2

    December 2, 2009

    Today I am thinking about Sam, but still pretty upset to find out he was dead. So I thought I’d use this shot of him and Leni Riefenstahl as a springboard to discussing a little bit about propaganda (obviously entire books and brilliant essays are devoted to this topic, I just want to think out loud a bit). So. Sam and Leni. They were not any type of friends, but they of course knew one another, because of the international stature both held as artists.


    This picture with Leni was taken in Munich in the early 70’s. We were serving on the jury for a photographic competition organised by Der Spiegel. A friendly argument developed during a break in the judging activities. Postal sacks filled with the competition entries swamped the corridors leaving little room for chairs. (“Leni Riefenstahl,” Sam’s blog, entry dated 3/15/07)

    Leni Riefenstahl is a divisive and problematic figure for me to wrap my brain around: while her career has been largely brilliant, and I suppose each piece of art ought be considered an entity unto itself, she is a photographer and cinematographer from whom for me it is difficult to separate the facts of her life and her art. See, her body of work is great, but it also contains The Triumph of the Will, a handy piece of pure propaganda which launched her to forever-infamy and helped sway many to the National Socialist way of thinking.


    Leni Riefenstahl with Heinrich Himmler at Nuremberg, 1934.

    Yeah, that’s Heinrich Himmler and her at Nuremberg, 1934, setting up a cozy little scene for the camera. It’s significant and somewhat ironic to me and, you likely too, because, of course, she and Himmler and Joseph Goebbels, spinmeister, were busy here trying to launch some Nazi ships of popularity, and ultimately the career of many a Nazi ended there, eleven years later at the trials. Riefenstahl was arrested after World War II, but was not tried at Nuremberg, nor ever convicted of any crimes. Fair or unfair? Question for discussion: is propaganda a crime? A con of the highest order, making it a physical and emotionally abusive crime of course, as any manipulative act must be, but also, and perhaps more strangely, a crime against art itself? A violation of its core function? If the purpose of art is to express yourself, and we see that for some being provocative is how they do it (I do not believe the work of shock artists violates or upheaves what I’ve just advanced as the core purpose of art; I believe their work still falls beneath the aegis of self-expression, whether they understand that or not), then is propaganda a gross perversion of the core purpose, forcing a perspective on the viewer rather than expressing one’s own, muscling and manipulating and violating the relationship between seer and seen?


    Leni and crew filming those all-important ’36 Olympics.

    We talked about what happens when art imitates life, and when art imitates art, but what about when life imitates art because art influences life? What would Leni’s dear friend Goebbels, the undisputed grandfather of the spin and the catchy
    slogan, answer, if he had not been tipped off as to his imminent arrest and killed himself rather than face trial in the liberated Germany? What are the implications of how propaganda was used politically, with our historical understanding, when we look now at modern instances of using art to increase the popularity of a product or idea, from advertising of food and beverages to people and philosophies and lifestyles?


    Golden Globe and Academy Award winner Charlize Theron for Christian Dior, “J’Adore” parfum.

    Or am I all backward. Is the opposite so? Is all art propaganda of some kind? One of my favorite movies, The Cradle Will Rock, written and directed by Tim Robbins, which is set during the 1930’s, draws consistent symbolic parallels between artists and whores, and even has a line where William Randolph Hearst says, not sneeringly, but simply with a practical confidence, “And artists are whores — like the rest of us.” Has the relationship between art and advertising and commercialism and pop cultural consciousness come so far that there is no way to ever go back? And, fuck, what do I know, like is that so wrong?


    “Tommy Hilfiger Celebrates Sam Haskins.”

    “We have burnt our bridges. We cannot go back, but neither do we want to go back. We are forced to extremes and therefore resolved to proceed to extremes.” (Joseph Goebbels, 1943)

    I do not have answers. I’m frustrated and bummed and totally confusing myself. I quit! I’ll regroup and come back to this a different day.