Archive for December, 2009

Post-Holiday Pick-Up Day! : Miss December 1992, Barbara Moore

December 26, 2009

Thought I’d help you beat the weird post-holiday slump today (unless you are in Canadialand in which case you’re opening all your Boxing Day gifts and hoarking down the moose jerky and Molson’s today in front of a hockey game anyway, so you hosers wait and check it out tomorrow!) with some lovely and talented Miss Decembers of yore.

Unlike the NSFW November fiasco, I got no intention of doing every single Miss December ever: I have instead culled the herd to a manageable flock of interesting favorites. Enjoy!


Photographed by Stephen Wayda.

Besides having managed to keep quite a tenacious hold on the D-list spotlight of sorts (really it’s more like a kid shining a flashlight under their face at summer camp) over her career, the lovely and talented Barbara Moore, Miss December 1992, had quite the “electric” magnetism — she was struck by lightning three years before her Playboy appearance.

It was a rainy night in Nashville when the lights went out. Barbara Moore was walking down Acklen Avenue when it happened. Zap! A bolt of lightning whams down about 12 inches from her pretty ankles. Streetlights are blinking and so is she, tiptoeing down the avenue, thinking, “I almost didn’t live to turn twenty-two.”

Miss Moore was born in Spokane, Washington, which is where a lot of my cousins live. Those who abandoned Priest River, the small town we’re all from in the top of Idaho, and were drawn to the siren call of the sinful Big City — for shame! Spokane is the Sodom to Boise’s Gomorrah! (This probably means nothing to you, but trust me, it’s really funny. Would it help to add that neither Spokane nor Boise has over 210,000 people?)


Who else do you know who has worked a slime line? Barbara did, at a salmon cannery in Ketchikan, Alaska, where she gutted fish as they passed on a conveyer belt. She has been a flight attendant, a tournament polo player, a model and an actress who has made videos with Waylon Jennings, Hank Williams, Jr., and Reba McEntire that have aired nationally on TNN and CMT. Now she is Miss December — a woman you’re sure to love if you desire a little excitement. (“The Moore, the Merrier,” Playboy, December 1992.)

More excitement than working at a cannery in Ketchikan? The hell you say! God, sometimes I miss the Pacific Northwest. Then I go to the grocery, in the sun, in regular shoes with no galoshes, and there are no crazy people with carts of cans raving front-door-side that AIDS is the lord’s punishment for homosexshualls, and no relatives with missing teeth working the register and reminding me of the time I fell in the crick and my bra came undone (worst. hike. ever.). There is just sterile, spray-tanned, PTA propriety, with small smiles and simple “Merry Christmases.” Mmm. I like you, Cali. I will keep you.


Barbara Moore’s celebrity rose in 2004 when she began dating actor Lorenzo Lamas. Ironically, she had met Lamas through her friend and fellow Playmate Shauna Sand, who was married to Lamas at the time. They were scheduled to marry in July 2005, however the wedding was called off at the last moment, reportedly after Lamas discovered Moore in the company of a male stripper at her bachelorette party. (the wiki)

No way! Lorenzo Lamas, you are a man whose sound and sober judgment I would normally implicitly trust, but I must ask: are you sure?? Because Barbie just doesn’t seem like the type to promote nor enjoy nudity!

Well, that’s it for your first Post-Holiday Pick-Up entry. I’ll schedule a few more of these for later in the day, so stay tuned!

Daily Batman: Batfamily Christmas

December 26, 2009

Holiday greetings from a truly dysfunctional bunch. Talk about secrets.

Getting everyone gathered for a photograph to smile at the same time and not be blinking or pulling a face is a total nightmare, am I right??


by eikochan on deviantart.

l to r: Selina Kyle, Bruce Wayne, Tim Drake, Barbara Gordon, Dick Grayson, and Alfred Pennyworth. Dig Alfred bunny-earing Dick and Strawberry Shortstacked in the first take.

Daily Batman: Christmas is going to the cats — kickass present from Milo!

December 25, 2009

Milo Weasel gave me this smashing custom piece of art for the holidays.

Thanks, buddy! You’re the best!

Music Moment — The Song Remains the Same: “Blue Christmas,” cover by Nicole Atkins, NSFW pictures by Ellen Von Unwerth feat. Ana Beatriz Barros

December 25, 2009

One of my favorite holiday songs brought to wonderfully creepy, multi-track resonant life by super-hot fave Nicole “lionface” Atkins.

Nicole Atkins – Blue Christmas


All photos from Ellen Von Unwerth featuring Ana Beatriz Barros. “Merry Me,” V Magazine Iss. #32 (2004).

“Blue Christmas,” music and lyrics by Jay W. Johnson and Billy Hays, 1947. The holiday rock ‘n roll classic was originally recorded by Ernest Tubb, 1948, charted by Elvis Presley in 1957 and again by the Beach Boys in 1964.


I’ll have a blue Christmas without you
I’ll be so blue just thinking about you
Decorations of red on a green Christmas tree
Won’t be the same dear, if you’re not here with me


And when those blue snowflakes start falling
That’s when those blue memories start calling
You’ll be doing all right with your Christmas of white
But I’ll have a blue, blue Christmas


And when those blue snowflakes start falling
That’s when those blue memories start calling


You’ll be doing all right with your Christmas of white
But I’ll have a blue, blue Christmas


I’ll have a blue, blue *Christmas

* the girl can yodel like Wanda Jackson and Patsy, even. God, I love her.

Happy Christmas

December 25, 2009

It’s Christmas: do what feels right!

Have a holly jolly one, party people.

Joanie Dearest would want it that way.

Movie and Music Moment: “It Feels Like Christmas,” The Muppet Christmas Carol (1992)

December 24, 2009

It’s in the singing of the street corner choir…

Yes, Virginia, there IS a Santa Claus —

December 24, 2009


RIP, Queenie. This photograph was taken by Bunny Yeager, who sold it to Hef for use in Playboy, but like the first “centerfold” of Marilyn, was never actually taken under the auspices of the Playmate of the Month title.

— it is Bettie Page! but her eyes are wonky as hayull; why did they not reshoot this picture?

Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good night!

Daily Batman: The Loneliest Men in the World

December 24, 2009

Yes, Virginia, there IS a Santa Claus —

December 24, 2009

— on the moooooon!

Yes, Virginia, there IS a Santa Claus —

December 24, 2009

— and it is imperative that you not put Irish Cream in his egg nog.

Care for me, I am not as prickly as I seem.

December 24, 2009

Need to paste this to my face for the holidays.

To: my wonderful family of loving, noisy, boisterous, pushy, adoring extroverts.

From: the one in the kitchen making fifty cheese trays so as to avoid the heart-to-heart chats you desperately want to corner me for.

I am not a humbug, I’m actually very into the holidays and enjoy seeing everyone open gifts, but I feel awkward receiving them and your attention and that will never change. I am not trying to ruin Christmas by not enjoying being photographed, but I do love taking pictures, so slap my kid on your lap and give me a grin. I am very in to hearing about what you’ve been up to, but yes, I am still getting a divorce, and no I emphatically sure as fuck do not wish to talk about it; that is to do with my feelings and not to do with you and your overtures of discussion. I am sure you are a great listener, I am just not much of a great talker. I have huge piles of love and optimism in my heart but I also have to hide from big displays of emotion. Let’s all focus on understanding each other instead of projecting expectations. I will try not to resent your demands of pictures and prying questions and recognize them for the signs of love that they are, and you let me have a little airpsace.

Yes, Virginia, there IS a Santa Claus —

December 24, 2009

— and he kicks zombie ogre ass using a candy cane throwing dagger and what looks to be some manner of katana.

Yes, Virginia, there IS a Santa Claus —

December 24, 2009

— and he is known to beat on the brat (beat on the brat, beat on the
brat with a baseball bat).

Beginning to look a lot like “X”-Mas

December 24, 2009


Picture via littleredhead on the tumblr: many more X-Files features to come thanks to her screencapping wonderfulness!

“Amor fati.”


גם זה לטובה

I want to learn more and more to see as beautiful what is necessary in things; then I shall be one of those who make things beautiful.

December 23, 2009

Sam Haskins Month, Day 18: “Mood swings”

December 18, 2009


“Mood swings,” 2006.

This picture actually juxtaposes the covers of Sam’s books Haskins Posters (1972) and November Girl (1966). He put it together a few years ago for a different book. The images as a single unit have become a very popular print.

Daily Batman: Movie Moment – Batman: The Movie (1966)

December 18, 2009

Though the producer had wanted to film the movie before the TV series, production didn’t start until network execs were sure they had a hit. Thus the gift of Batman: The Movie was not received by its awe-stricken public until July 30, 1966, between the first and second seasons. It’s quite the show.


Title sequence.

Favorite tagline is “MEN DIE! WOMEN SIGH! Beneath that Batcape — he’s all man!” and the best line is when Batman says, “They may be drinkers, Robin, but they’re still human beings.”


Holy papier-mâché!

Robin: Holy sardine!
Batman: Hand down the shark repellent Batspray!


The others I can understand, but whale repellent?

Riddler: You and your trained, exploding shark!
Penguin: How was I to know they’d have a can of shark repellent Bat-spray handy?

Model Citizen: Milla Jovovich

December 17, 2009

Spark up the candles (or, you know, whatever you spark on birthdays) and get ready to sing a happy 34th go-round on this earth with lots of good wishes and eskimo kisses to the lovely and talented Milla Jovovich! One of my favorite Model Citizens, mothers, and all-around good-time gals. Keep on rocking in the free world, kiddo.


High Times, October 1994.

It’s your birthday; do what feels right!


lost credit please help

And we should really all say thank you to Milla for the memories. I mean, you do not even know how grateful I am for the huge folder on my computer, chock-full of amazing pictures of the girl. It took me ages to pick the right ones for this post.


by Ellen Von Unwerth for Vogue Italia, July 2009.

Besides screencaps from films like Dazed and Confused, the Fifth Element, Joan of Arc, and the Resident Evil flicks, I had to decide between photographs from devil-horned shoots with Ellen von Unwerth, topless shenanigans by David La Chapelle, that phatty spread in High Times, even … it was truly a challenge.


Paper magazine, 1994.

Man, this girl has given me some smiles over the years. Do your thing, chicken wing. Haters to the left! You keep on keepin’ on.


by the notorious EVU, 1997

Sam Haskins Month, Day 17: Kate and Rosie, the plot thickens

December 17, 2009













I feel like I should mention I’ve been putting these up out of sequence so I don’t totally spoil the plot for you. Don’t forget to add Sam’s Cowboy Kate and Other Stories, the Director’s Cut to your Christmas wish list. You can get it from Powell’s Books, Amazon, or get on a mailing list with Dashwood to see when they get another copy.

Daily Batman: Bat couture — the Bat and a Model Citizen, by Thierry Le Gouès

December 17, 2009

Model citizen Ali Stephens plays sidekick to the Caped Crusader.

Images appeared in French Revue de Modes #15, “The Dark Knight,” October 2009.

Styled by Marcell Rocha and photographed by monster of rockingness Thierry Le Gouès .

All scans via the Fashion victims Russian Glamour community on the lj.

Campy clean fun! Also available on Fashionably Independent and Fashion Gone Rogue.