Posts Tagged ‘1975’

Valentine Vixen: Laura Misch Owens, Miss February 1975

February 18, 2010

So many Valentine Vixens to post up in all their fun and special glory, so little time left in February all of a sudden! Yikes. As with the NSFW November project, I am once more faced with the question of whether I’ve bit off more than I can chew. It’s a challenge, but that’s all right: I was so selective with this month’s lonelyhearts ladies, handpicking only my tippy-toppy-bestest, most favoritest centerfolds, that there is literally not a single one that I am not totally psyched to share more about with you. So let’s do this!


Photographed by Richard Fegley.

The lovely and talented Laura Misch Owens was Playboy’s Miss February 1975. Those aren’t just pretty code words for taking it off on this one, dudes. Besides being beautiful, as evinced by these photographs, Ms. Owens is also a brilliant, witty, published author who happens to be forthright, charming, and absolutely-fall-down-freaking-hysterically funny. I’m going to let her talent speak for itself as I juxtapose the Playboy purple prose that accompanied her pictorial spread for them with her own take on the events, excerpted from an article she contributed to Salon.com about her time as a New Orleans bunny, written in 2005.

The headline and summary for Salon run, “When I was a Playboy Bunny in New Orleans: ‘I married a cop of easy virtue, posed nude in Hef’s magazine, drank all night at Lucky Pierre’s, and appeared in the worst movie ever made. It was Big and it was Easy, and now it’s gone.'” (“When I Was a Playboy Bunny,” Misch, Laura. 10 Sept 2005. Salon.com.)

Playboy sez: “Delta Lady: Meet Laura Misch, a New Orleans lovely who’s taken the Crescent City to her heart. Lucky New Orleans!” (“Delta Lady.” February, 1975. Playboy.)

Playboy sez:

Fresh out of high school in Tulsa, Oklahoma, 18-year-old ex-cheerleader Laura Misch was confronted with that same question that has plagued most new high school graduates: What now? … She pictured herself with rabbit ears and a Bunny tail. She had an idea! “I dashed off a letter, enclosed a Polaroid of myself and sent it to the New Orleans Bunny Mother, since she was the closest to Tulsa,” Laura recalls. “The next thing I knew, I was in New Orleans with a new job.”


Laura writes:

I stepped off the Braniff flight from Tulsa, Okla., at Moisant Field on Jan. 12, 1973, with $34 in my pocket and the promise of a job as a Bunny at the New Orleans Playboy Club. I was 19, with big, proud titties suitable for framing, and wearing enough Maybelline to sink a barge in the Industrial Canal. I didn’t know it yet, but I would spend the next seven years in the City That Care Forgot. By the time I escaped its humid clutches, the Big Easy would fill me up and wring me dry.


On the subject of a career in moving pictures, Playboy quotes Laura and adds their own advertiser/biz-skewed copy to her youthful sentiments, saying,

“I adore everything about New Orleans. I’ll never leave.” This creates a conflict in her life, for she also wants to be a movie star (“Who doesn’t?”) and most stars have to emigrate to Hollywood sooner or later.

No longer a Bunny since the temporary closing of the New Orleans Club some months ago, Laura has just finished an on-location shooting as an extra in Dino De Laurentiis’ new film, Mandingo, starring James Mason and Susan George. In the movie, which is about life on a slave-breeding plantation in the pre-Civil War South, Laura plays one of the girls in a Mississippi delta whorehouse. This is how she describes her big scene: “A door opens and through the doorway you see me standing there, clutching my underwear. Then I blow a sensuous kiss to a satisfied customer.” Since it was her first scene in a movie, and she appeared seminude, to boot, Laura admits to having had a certain initial apprehension. “I thought it would be awful with all those people watching me,” she says. “But they were good about it and kept their eyes on my face.” If you say so, Laura. (Playboy, February 1975.)

I had lines in those movies but only walk-ons in Mandingo and Hard Times. Strange; I always played a prostitute. Didn’t they see my shining thespian talents?

Oh, Laura. You had me at “Hello!”


This picture of Laura as a young bunny in N’Awlins is not from the Playboy pictorial spread. It accompanied her delightfully fun article for Salon.com.
For her part, the real, unvarnished, marvelously disingenous Laura says today,

I’m sure you’ve seen me in Mardi Gras Massacre, having my innards cut out by a guy wearing an Aztec mask. One Web site lists this gem as one of the worst movies ever, ever made. I’m proud. And remember “French Quarter,” with Bruce Davison and Virginia Mayo? You don’t?

That’s OK, Davison apparently doesn’t either, because he won’t list it among his credits. You can run but you can’t hide, Brucie. I was there. You were in it, pal!

Adorbably candid! Love it.

On the subject of her corrupt-cop, but seemingly loving, as much as he could be, given all time and circumstances, husband during those years, I think Ms. Misch Owens has a light and bittersweet touch, appropriately appreciative/critical/reflective (as all reviews of such relationships must always be) but not overly maudlin; a delicate balance to reach.

Somewhere along the way I had gotten married to Eddie, a cop in the French Quarter. … I thought he was terribly exciting. He’d bring me along to all-nighters at Benny’s, a joint on the levee. I was required to sit silently for hours while Eddie twirled his gold wedding band.


Benny was like 75 with about three teeth and had a 14-year-old girlfriend. This last fact struck no one but me as particularly odd or disgusting. Like everything else wild and evil in New Orleans, it was greeted with a shrug and a wink.

He introduced me to the shady characters, shady ladies and shady ways of the Crescent City that I never would have tapped into otherwise. Without him, I never would have had a private room with a private waiter — Joey Guera — at Antoine’s. Never would have had a real king cake at a family party, never would have gone fishing out of Empire, La., with so much beer aboard our little flotilla that we almost sank. And if we had, so what? There is nothing like a native New Orleanian.

I cannot, in my broken state, express strongly enough how much I aspire to acheive Ms. Misch’s disarmingly candid brand of levelheaded, logical but loving, analytical prose in regard to my own dissolving marriage some day.

We parted ways, eventually. I went down to Miami and he went back to being a bachelor. He retired from the force as a lieutenant and was freelancing as a security man at “tittie bars” and rich people’s houses Uptown on Audubon Place, last I heard.

Reporting on recent events, Ms. Misch adds the following epilogue to her relationship with her Big Easy first husband:

I phoned him just before the eye of Katrina must have passed very near his house. I got his answering machine. Some silly nonsense about how he wasn’t home, he was checking out the latest Saints trade. I said, Hey, you idiot, call me.


He hasn’t called, and now I just get static when I dial the number. C’mon, Eddie, check in. Check in, dammit.

New Orleans is gone.

Today, Ms. Misch Owens is a novelist under the name of Laura Watt and has written non-fiction for the Miami Herald, the Rocky Mountain News, and the Denver Post. Sardonic and enduringly adorable — thanks a mil for the inspiration, Ms. Misch!

Movie Moment: Per mi amica, Condra edition — Grey Gardens

January 14, 2010

Happy birthday, Mme Condra, and many glad returns!

Grey Gardens (Hovde, Maysles, Maysles, and Meyer, 1975).


This is the best thing to wear for today, you understand. Because I don’t like women in skirts and the best thing is to wear pantyhose or some pants under a short skirt, I think. Then you have the pants under the skirt and then you can pull the stockings up over the pants underneath the skirt. And you can always take off the skirt and use it as a cape. So I think this is the best costume for today.


“The Libra husband is not an easy man to please. The monotony of domesticity is not to his liking, but he is a passionate man, and a respecter of tradition. … He is a born judge, and no other zodiacal type can order his life with so much wisdom.” God! That’s all I need — order! That’s all I need! An ordered life! You know, a manager. But he’s got to be a Libran.


It’s very difficult to keep the line between the past and the present. You know what I mean? It’s awfully difficult.


In the film, it appears as though Lois Wright only gave a box to Edith Bouvier Beale for her birthday. However, she also gave Edith the sign that reads, “The Great Singer, Big Edith Bouvier Beale.” (the imdb)


He always compliments me on the way I do my corn.


— You can’t have your cake and eat it, too in this life.
— Oh, yes, I did! I did. I had my cake. Loved it, masticated it, chewed it and had everything I wanted.


Thank you for your card and your ice-cream, I love you very much!

All stills courtesy onsunset on the lj.

NSFW November: Janet Lupo, Miss November 1975

November 17, 2009

As I mentioned before, I have more playmates than days in the month so I’m doubling up today and pretty much every day ’til the end of November; can’t miss a Miss, that would be a tragic oversight.

The lovely and talented Janet Lupo began as a bunny in Hoboken, New Jersey, but was persuaded to pose as the centerfold for the November, 1975 issue of Playboy.


Photographed by Pompeo Posar.

For my money, she looks like a more bummed-out, more stacked version of Faye Valentine. (If you don’t know who that is, I recommend that you don’t google her even at all if you are at work.) Anyway, I’ve been crunching some numbers and I’m pretty sure there are a disproportionate number of redheaded Miss Novembers, but I’ll do a final tally at the end of the month.

Quite the tan for a Jersey girl, but I guess they got the shore. And it looks like she has been following Sophia Loren’s advice that if a lady wants curves she ought to eat lots and lots of spaghetti, so good on her for that! From Ms. Lupo’s official site: “Janet is 5’6″ and measures 39-25-36 (100% Natural) and is of Italian/Czech/Irish descent. She is currently living on the East Coast with her son, whom she absolutely adores.”

If you are into astrological bunk, Janet is an Aquarius with Scorpio rising and moon in Taurus. That probably means there is a list of attributes about her that could apply to anyone with an open mind, and she should do something generic like weigh risks today before making decisions, which no one ever thinks to do unless the horoscope says to, right? Boy, I’m grouchy about the zodiac today. I guess my Mars is in retrograde or some kind of bullshit.


It was April 1974 when I drove up to Playboy’s Great Gorge Resort hotel in McAfee, NJ. I didn’t have an appointment with the ‘Bunny Mother,’ but that didn’t stop me from pretending as if I did. The security guard called the ‘Bunny Mother’ on the phone and told her I was waiting to meet with her for our interview. To my surprise he said, “Sandy, the ‘Bunny Mother’ will see you now.” After the interview, she told me she usually telephones you within two weeks if you’re to be hired as a ‘Bunny’ but in this instance she said, “I’m hiring you on the spot cause you have ‘chutzpah’.” She knew all along that I didn’t have an appointment, but she never let on until that moment. — Janet Lupo, official bio.

Today, Ms. Lupo travels to Glamourcon and is available for other public appearances. She has worked previously as a bartender and real estate agent, and presently works as a cosmetologist. You can order autographed photos and trading cards from her official site.