Posts Tagged ‘camping’

Careful out there, campers

August 13, 2010

Normally I would tell you, “It’s Friday: do what feels right,” but … Hey-hey-hey! It’s Friday the You-Know-What’nth. (swelling organ music.) Didn’t even know it ’til my own mother mentioned it to me on the phone from work. And Paolo and Miss D actually are, in fact, going camping. OH, NOES! (organ music again!) Pretty sure they’ll be fine, actually.

How does Fate even know to give you bad luck on the supposedly notoriously ill-famed Friday the 13th? What is its reckoning — are we talking Greenwich Mean Time, here, or what? It’s already tomorrow in Tokyo. Just seems like we’ve nothing to fear.

Except thermonuclear radiation. And flying spiders. And thermonuclearly irradiated flying spiders from Tokyo, the world’s leading exporter of thermonuclearly irradiated monsters, where as I have made clear it is already tomorrow so the dudes are from the future to boot. I guess if you want to stay safe today or any day, don’t cross Tokyo. This is my best advice … ever.

Honestly? We make our own luck.

Per mi amico: Husbandoh, “‘Congradulations’ on your birthday” edition

June 21, 2010

Happy birthday, HRH.

I know it’s weird with us all in estrangement and the like, but the important thing I want you to remember is the time we went to Lucy’s Table and that one waitress who later opened a meditative health center with her husband dropped the champagne as she popped the cork and it spun in the air as it fell and it hosed down THE ENTIRE RESTAURANT in a ten foot radius and the windows and tables and all those third-wave anorexic hipster yippies were dripping with wine. We did that.

Then we went to sit outside with our dessert and that very nice but drunk as shit first-wave yippie lady told us about walking around naked in front of her son when he was young, and then she apologized to us at great length for her generation being poor stewards of the earth and they misspelled “Congratulations” in some kind of very expensive alcohol-and-caramel-dulce-de-leche reduction sauce on your flourless chocolate cake plate.

Sometimes I forget that through no deliberate actions of your own you are somehow elected by the forces in this universe to be a one-man wrecking-crew of every situation you enter. Thank you for being a genial agent of chaos akin to Pigpen, because the anxious uptight energy of my yin at that time deserved and needed that yang to grow and see that what we must always try to do in this world is to stop time and bring back what’s died and it is not a thing we can do alone.

Thank you for trying with me. Happy birthday.

Langston Hughes Month: Walkers With the Dawn

May 19, 2010

Being walkers with the dawn and morning,
Walkers with the sun and morning,
We are not afraid of night,
Nor days of gloom,
Nor darkness–
Being walkers with the sun and morning.

(Langston Hughes,”Walkers With the Dawn”)